tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3230664933538461949.post4402970773176839704..comments2023-10-30T07:28:27.097-04:00Comments on Gotham Ghostwriters: Gerson Speech-Critiques ObamaGotham Ghostwritershttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17763863284206933224noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3230664933538461949.post-67467960117390965402010-01-15T16:58:30.371-05:002010-01-15T16:58:30.371-05:00A speechwriter friend of ours chimed in with some ...A speechwriter friend of ours chimed in with some thoughtful points in response to Gerson's analysis and mine.<br /><br />"Bush's use of Gerson's post-9/11 poetry has made that approach to war rhetoric appear tinny (which is just as well -- the curse of speechwriting is everyone wanting to be the next churchill, reagan, and lincoln) in the same way that Iraq has soured the public on democracy promotion and preventive war," he wrote.<br /><br />"In that sense, the matter-of-fact tone of obama's afghan speech was just right: sober, rational, explanatory. Appealing to reason, not fear.<br /><br />"But Obama's speeches, though no-doubt thoughtful and well-written, have been undermined by some basic things:<br /><br />-too long: in every good 40 minute obama speech there's a crisp, cogent, excellent 30 minute speech wanting to get out with some better organizations and disciplined editing<br /><br />-too self referential: it's not the campaign so the personal pronoun can be given a breather<br /><br />-the construct of presenting himself as the reasonable middle between two unreasonable extremes is getting shopwornGotham Ghostwritershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17763863284206933224noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3230664933538461949.post-33476276107039580342010-01-15T16:07:11.489-05:002010-01-15T16:07:11.489-05:00For me, the most glaring problem with Obama's ...For me, the most glaring problem with Obama's speeches has been the fact that his rhetoric is far too obvious.<br />In other words, I could have articulated what Obama was about to say. Don't tell me what I already know, tell me what you belive in, and more importantly, tell me what you are going to do about it.<br />Bill Clinton was the master at this. His team already had a game plan in place to address some public problem...then he'd deliver his speech and be able to give creedence to his words with actions. Thus, Clinton came off as a Rainmaker of sorts.<br /><br />Give us hope and then close the deal.Kevin Lagolahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01881631594547246232noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3230664933538461949.post-82839630192711962722010-01-15T15:46:14.709-05:002010-01-15T15:46:14.709-05:00I agree with Anonymous' contention that great ...I agree with Anonymous' contention that great orators can and often do rise to the occasion with inspiration in times of great trial, and I was not suggesting otherwise, or excusing Obama's performance. <br /><br />I was just trying to explain why HE has not taken that route. That's mostly, as I said, because he's not really an emotive or rousing speaker to begin with, so it's not his M.O. But I do suspect that the grueling demands on him, and the multiplicity of the challenges he's facing, is also a factor. Lincoln had an existential mission in the Civil War, but it was a singular mission, and he was able to focus almost all of his energy on it. Obama is fighting major battles on at least four fronts and each with different enemies and weapons. I would never compare any of them to what Lincoln had to go through, but I do think the difference here matters, and that Obama has a tougher task in rallying the country on any one of them.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07513701524467204714noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3230664933538461949.post-66885255949999481792010-01-15T15:26:53.269-05:002010-01-15T15:26:53.269-05:00You say that all the challenges that Obama faces i...You say that all the challenges that Obama faces is "just not an environment conducive to inspiration, both in term of the gravity of the different crises we're living through and the personal strain that the president must be feeling."<br /><br />I don't think you could be more wrong- this is exactly the time when a great speechmaker is able to flex his or her speechifying muscles and when those skills are most valued.<br /><br />Clinton, if I recall, claimed that he was short-shrifted because he didn't lead in a time of great crisis and couldn't let his substantial rhetorical skills soar. <br /><br />Your excuse for President Obama is like saying that was hampered from giving great remarks because he was conducting the Civil War, and that's balderdash.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com