Sorensen Speechwriting Award Winners

Our congratulations to Brenda Jones, winner of the second annual Sorensen Speechwriting Award, for her work on the keynote address delivered by Rep. John Lewis on the 60th anniversary of the National Trust for Historic Preservation.


Kudos also to the two speechwriters who received Honorable Mention: Grant Neely for “Why Business Must Change to Earn Back Trust,” delivered by Jeff Kindler, chairman and CEO of Pfizer; and LeeAnne Petry for “Leading through a Fundamental Business Transformation,” delivered by Paul A. Laudicina, managing officer and chairman of A.T. Kearney.

Michael Long from the White House Writers Group penned an excellent tribute to the three honorees over at Ragan, which included some valuable insights from these writers about their craft.

“The speech is a tool… [and] a springboard that elevates the speaker beyond the words to the point where he can touch the audience,” says Jones, who writes speeches for Lewis, a civil rights icon. “People invite our bosses to speak because they want to hear from them, not from us. I embed myself deep within that speech, so I am visible only to [the speaker].

“If you can’t explain what you’re trying to say in a couple of clear sentences, it’s probably because you don’t know,” Neely adds. “That’s why people fall into the seductive embrace of passive [verbs] and words like leverage, maximize, utilize, strategize and synergize. They’re meant to obscure ideas, not express them.”

We were particularly impressed by Jones' deconstruction of what she described as her "impossible task" in connecting the civil rights movement to architectural preservation.

“My job was to craft an address set in Nashville, which is almost a second home to my boss,” she says. “His experiences there are the foundation for all that he accomplished as a participant and leader in the civil rights movement and as a member of Congress.”


 Lewis was returning to the campus where he was a student during the sit-in movement in the 1960s.

“Because my boss is trained as a minister, he likes to discuss philosophy… to prick an individual’s conscience and inspire them to do what is right. For a while, I was stumped about how to create the intimate connection … using the seemingly impersonal topic of architectural preservation!”

Her solution was to cast the physical characteristics of the historic location as a metaphor for the struggles of the era:

How do you tell the story of a nation? Is it only present in the splendor of well-designed walls or carved in elegant stone? Or can a simple, plain edifice act as a witness to the power of a people to overcome the trials of humanity? … The majesty of the building was not around us, it was in us, and those walls witnessed the spirit we had within. 

 

The Skinny on Oscar's New Skinniness

For you Oscar speech geeks, Vanity Fair provides a handy breakdown of the changes the show's producers have made this year to slim down the acceptance speeches and the rest of the program.  The most noticeable adjustment: a ban on the droning "thank yous" that have become a regrettable staple of the show.

Here's how VF explains it: "Instead of having weepy Oscar winners recite grocery lists of thanks to everyone from their personal trainer to their backup mailman while forgetting their husbands (don’t worry, Hilary Swank, I’m sure your now ex-husband Chad forgave you), Oscar’s heartless new producers have instructed winners to prepare two speeches: one expressing how much the Oscars mean to them, and another in which they can thank whoever they want backstage for a video that will be consigned to the black hole known as the Internet. Thou shalt worship no god but the Academy."

P.S.  Vanity Fair also has posted a mildly funny spoof of the acceptance speech "Avatar" director James Cameron is preparing —a faux "early draft" that mocks Cameron's infamous King of the World claim and dings George Clooney.  With all due respect, our Jokewriters could have done a heckuva lot better.  Seriously, is"True Lies" anywhere near as parody-rich as "Terminator"?

Gotham's Oscar Speech Poll

In the grand tradition of the Oscar pool, we thought it would be fun to poll our friends in the writing community about who they think will be in the big winners and losers in the acceptance speech derby Sunday night.

Before you submit your nominees, a quick programming note.  To shorten the Oscar broadcast this year, the show's producers have banished the usual tiresome "thank you" litanies to backstage.  So count on Sunday's speeches to be crisper and at least slightly meatier.

With that, here are the categories.  Feel free to submit your nominees below in the comments section. Or you can email them to us at: info@gothamghostwriters.com.

Best performance by a winner you have never heard of:
Which obscure statue-grabber will make a name for themselves with a memorable speech moment?

Worst performance by a winner everyone has heard of:
Which A-list star will go the furthest in making a fool of themselves?

Fastest Hook in the West Award:
Which speech rambler will be the first to get awkwardly cut off and shooed away by the time cops?

Best Original Wordplay:
Which quipster will come off with the most witty line of the night?

The Sean Penn Memorial Political Tirade Award:
Which crusading celeb will go on the most inappropriate jag for their pet cause?

Gotham Goes To The Oscars: Live Chat and More

We got such a great response to our State of the Union live commentary that we're planning a sequel for the country's next great speechfest — this Sunday's Oscar show.

Over the next couple days, our speechwriters will be online to make their predictions about which stars will shine and who will flop in their acceptance remarks, as well as a few speechy tips for the big award winners. Then during the show Sunday night, they will be offering running reviews and commentary in a live chat on Twitter.

We hope you will show that you really, really like us (h/t Sally Field) by joining in the conversation. Extra points if you can translate James Cameron's speech from Nav'i into English.

Here's how you can be part of the festivities:

BLOGG POLL: To kick things off, we will be posting a preview poll today asking who will be the big winners and losers in best Oscar speech category. Feel free to weigh in with your picks in the comments section.

FACEBOOK: The easiest way to join the conversation is to sign up for our Facebook event page, which you can find here.

TWEETCHAT: We have set up a dedicated chat room on Twitter for the show Sunday night. You can follow the hashtag #oscarspeeches. Or just jump into the conversation here.

Who will be this year's Oscar tearjerker? Who will be the obnoxious jerk? Tune in, find out, and tell us.

Latest Gerstein Forbes Column

In his weekly political column for Forbes.com out today, Gotham President Dan Gerstein offers a big-picture post-mortem on last Thursday's White House health care summit.  His take:

As I listened to the same tone-deaf talking points from the congressional Democrats at the White House health care summit last week, I was reminded of the classic excuse politicians use about their comments being taken out of context. In this case, and many others, the Democrats are suffering from the exact opposite problem--their arguments and actions are not taking in the context of the times. Indeed, over the past 14 months they have continually been trying to jam a square political peg into a round historical hole. The result has been a disastrous fit with the public mood and a deepening credibility gap.

You can read the full column here.

Sarah Palin's Comedy Debut Is No Joke

Last night Sarah Palin made her comedic debut on "The Tonight Show" with typically great fanfare, delivering a monologue that New York Magazine says "needs to be seen to be believed."  We asked one of our Gotham Jokewriters, author and stand-up comic Jeff Kreisler, to review Palin's appearance, both in terms of her material and her delivery.  Here is his report.

I've got to put a few things aside to analyze her comedy: 

1. My political opinion of her
2. My comedy opinion of Jay Leno
3. The fact that her first time performing... was on The (expletive deleted) Tonight Show.  I'm a stand-up comic.  I wouldn't say I'm "bitter" or "jealous."  More like, "re-evaluating" and "crying."

That done (be brave, Kreisler), strictly from a comedy perspective, I gotta admit, she did pretty well.  She's definitely comfortable in front of an audience, being the center of attention, and handling pressure.  Those are characteristics of a comedian (and politician) that are difficult to teach.  She's a natural.

Constructive criticism time!

On the material:

• I think the material fit her very well.  It was safe, simple, and straightforward.  It wasn't edgy or super original or unexpected... but that's why it worked for her.  The material sounded like her.  It was in harmony with her voice, her opinion, her character... her (shudder) brand.  That's what you need to do when you write for someone else — make it sound like the person. 

• Personally, I wasn't in love with the jokes — the only one with any spark was the Tina Fey line — but I'm not being asked to perform 'em or pay to see 'em. 

• There were three joke topics:  Alaska, politics, and Sarah Palin, superstar.  I would've lumped the jokes about each topic together, rather than spreading them out haphazardly.  There didn't seem to be any real arch or reasoned order to the bits.

On her performance:

• Biggest criticism: Wait for the laughs to start fading.  She began each new joke as the reaction was reaching its peak, raising her voice to speak over the noise, rather than letting the laughter and applause at least begin to fade before moving on.  She cut off her own energy, instead of letting the momentum build. 

• She swallowed some punchlines.  Could've emphasized the endings of jokes more. 

• While in general her presence was good, and she certainly wasn't monotone, her physicality on the one NRA joke was off.  The key part of that bit was her six-shooting "or else" moment, and she didn't deliver, it just got lost in the general adulation from the crowd. 

• Again, she clearly likes talking in front of people, and she's good at it.

Have No Fear, Magazine Writers

A new study on online magazines by the Columbia Journalism Review has the media world buzzing.  CJR Editor Victor Navasky proclaimed the findings — which showed that fact-checking and copy-editing are substantially less rigorous online — "depressing." New York Magazine, on the other hand, argued that Navasky's gloom-and-doom is an overreaction, stating that magazine websites are still in their infancy, and naturally need time to streamline their operations.

Our view?  Digital reporting and writing may suffer from lax standards today, but that's not a foregone conclusion tomorrow.  Typos and inaccuracies are not endemic to web journalism — they're just natural for a young, rapidly-changing medium.  As online magazines evolve and mature, and as more and more readers migrate to the Web, standards will inevitably rise —if for no other reasons consumers will demand it.

In the meantime, how would you improve online writing and editing?